Finally

After 2 long years I'm free! Im not saying I regret being with my current company. Im actually thankful to be here. I have gained experience and meet people from all walks of life.  But 2 years is enough time for me to realize some things in life.

First, loneliness. I thought I was at times felt this before until I came here. I thought to myself "aaaah so this is what it really feels like".

Second, "two faced people". How can someone fake a sincere looking smile. How can someone be such a boss sucker. I never met such a dark heart.

Third, loneliness breathes unhappiness. I think these two are siblings. Hehe. But thankfully I have work that keeps me busy all the time. Keeps  me unaffected and nonchalant at all times.

Fourth, I learned to enjoy solitary shopping and dining like a toddler enjoys solitary play. Yah know what I mean!

Fifth, after everything I still have mix feelings about this. Im leaving a very big part of me. The kids, the people, the memories and the experiences---they are all priceless to me. I thank God for the learning  experience.  In loneliness I have found Him. In every situation, He never left. Never will.

God please help me. I know have loss my way. I have loss vision of the purpose why Im here. Forgive me. I was too occupied of work. What will I do? Why am I like this? Please save me from myself. Heal me completely that I may see You cleary. I pray that I may be blessed with the job that You want me to have. Be with me, thats all I need, thats all I pray.